YOUR PERFECT MATE...

TODAY MY MESSAGE IS: WHAT MAKES A "PERFECT" MATE? 

First off, I hope you already know that there is no such thing as a perfect human being.    The last perfect human being to walk the earth got crucified 2000 years ago, and we haven't found another one like him since then. So, stop trying to find one to date or marry because they don't exist. Can you say: "A needle in a haystack?"

What you will find is a person,... a human being...with weaknesses, flaws and personality traits... that you can either live with or not. You are not going to change a grown person, no matter how hard you try. That person must want to change FOR THEMSELVES...NOT FOR YOU! So, stop thinking that you are going to find someone who fits your particular MOLD of a perfect mate.

If you are in a relationship that is "working for you"...count yourself as one of the TRULY BLESSED on this Earth because trying to find another human being who shares your own particular likes, dislikes, or strengths and weaknesses is like finding a pearl at an oyster shucking contest. Oh, you may get lucky, alright...it's not IMPOSSIBLE to find that person...it's just really, really, difficult. And, the reason why it is so difficult is because of what I said in the beginning..."You can't find something that only exists in your mind."

You have to realize what is REAL, what is reasonable, and what is not.

You may have what are called "tolerances" or things that you might put up with, but really don't care to have around you, because they basically, rub you the wrong way. But after, five or ten years of being rubbed the wrong way and you will end up with a serious RELATIONSHIP RASH. That's that incurable sore spot on your entire being that makes you either physically or mentally ill just thinking about all of the crap you've been through in your relationships!!

So, if you don't want to lose your mind, or lose your health, your money, your home, your children, or anything else that YOU value in your life because you hooked up with the wrong person...I advise you to GET OUT NOW!! Sit down make a list of your personal TOLERANCES and those things that you absolutely will NOT TOLERATE. 

Things like: disrespect, financial irresponsibility, physical abuse, unhealthy lifestyles, anger, slovenliness, gambling, and infidelity.  And, then make a list of the things that bother you but you could possibly live with them, without them becoming a serious problem. Things like: temporary unemployment, or mild untidiness, temporary outbursts of emotion, --- some bad but not horrible habits...whatever. 

YOU HAVE TO KNOW your own limits. And, a relationship will test your personal limits to the very end, believe me. Unless you are willing to GO THE DISTANCE and work with what you got...OTHERWISE, IT'S TIME TO GO FISHING!